Just minutes before this writing I was listing down the countries and provinces where God has placed me for the past years and it totally just amazes me – like, I have been asking myself- How did God do all these things?
I’ve lived in a different country and culture for two years, stayed in another country with a whole new culture for a whole month, and then packed my bags for another whole month and roam around 3 countries. All for the mission and for the command of Jesus to spread the Word to His people.
Attended 3 World Youth Days in a row, hang around young and cool people in Spain, Brazil and Poland, ate a lot of food, explored cultures, lived with them, taste different kinds of beers and wines and cried when I stepped down on a train knowing I am in Florence.
And again I ask – why me? I don’t have a lot of money, I think am a very shy person, I actually don’t want to talk in front of people (computers are more fun, right? just kidding). I don’t think I am talented enough or have enough skills to work for Him – to work with Him – to be with Him. I don’t even think I am inspiring.
But it all came with one, or two actually, or three or yah a lot of “YES.” Because God, actually, asks you a lot of times. And He often asks. Yes, true, God likes to ask a lot. A LOT.
When I decided to work as a fulltime Catholic missionary, I said yes – disappointing a lot of people. I’m walking away from a nice cool career. But I was afraid more to disappoint God. So, that was a YES.
When I decided to sing that song – “To the Ends of the Earth” – I never thought I have said yes to Jesus, because a month after that surrendering, I was asked to go on mission to Kenya and Tanzania, Africa. Oh my, Philippines to Africa – I was only 23 years old and – what would I do there? And there, it all happened.
When once again He bothered asking if I could work for Him through sharing the good news through media – making websites for Him, design for Him (while drinking coffee), the call became personal. Because it involves me – my desires, what I can do, the things He wanted me to do. I am a sinner, I make mistakes – a lot of mistakes but He wants me to live for Him – He wanted me to live with Him – taking me anywhere He wants me to be.
There are lonely moments too – yeah, life is not perfect – but He makes you stronger. Moments when you feel you are alone on mission or are we really doing the things we ought to be. There are challenges, trials, moments of trusting only in His provision. There are moments when you do not know what to do but just stare at Him on the cross – He suffered more than me. There are moments when you are physically tired and just offer some rest to Him.
But again, He takes you where He wants to take you. He takes care of your whole being. He never fails.
He takes me to places that awes me. I would not forget every time I would step off a plane and see a place for the first time. I would utter a small “thank you” because if I have not said my first yes, then all these yeses would not happen.
I have learned to live the way He wants me too. And I am still learning each step of the way. To live with nothing but only trusting in Him. Sometimes the way is too foggy to have a clear view but then all you can do is trust the driver of your life – the author of your story – and live each day.